‘He is a hero, a true born and bred hero. Full of grit and so handsome I sometimes have to squint my eyes. He is an archetypical hero if there ever was one. No doubt about it. But in that lies my concern about us, him and me. I have come to the conclusion that his lifelong essence is being that hero. I realize that almost all of his capacity is reserved to that essentiality. And maybe that’s how it should be. In any case - and this is important - I fully believe that he would be untrue to himself if he was not that hero, and if so, he would be miserable. Thus, I can’t marry him. Maybe I don’t even deserve him, but even if that is true, that is not my concern. The thing is, his focus makes him one-sided, and that will ruin it for us. No one can question that he is passionate and knowledgeable about all that relates to his duties, like air planes and his missions. And it’s truly admirable - not in any way pretentious - that he himself knows that he, and only he, performs the duty at hand to perfection ever time - because it is true. But his character is built fully around being that hero and fulfilling those duties as expected, and like that, something essential is lacking. For instance, he is not able to relax and simply have fun, it’s not in him and he will not change, at least not in any way that makes a real difference.
In a way, over time, that one-sidedness makes him somewhat dull. It’s awful to say, but I thought about it for a long time. Also, as a woman who have no real business with his duties, I will remain an outsider, a spectator who only get an occasional glimpse into his essential world and only play a peripheral role. If we married I would become an accessory in his life, like a key fob - perhaps useful but mainly handy, perhaps just decorative. He might be happy just the same, but I would become restless, unhappy, perhaps one day even bitter and spiteful. I love him, but this scenario must not become our lives. Thus, I will not work out for us. That is why I can’t marry him, and that simply must be my reply, and all he needs to know and would want to know, if he does not already.’
The photograph was discovered in a second hand shop. It came with a handwritten note on the backside. The note names the pilot, and reveal that he crashed and died a week after his picture was taken.